|

|
|
Breaking Free
a monthly newsletter from Traci Duez & Break Free Consulting
Think better, Choose
better, Perform better, Live better
|
|
|
|
|
Fears & Fearlessness
|
|
|
Do you recognize the common
fears that may be getting in your way every day? Many
times we don't because "we've always been that way."
Some of the common fears that
often times
unknowingly hold us back are:
-
Fear of Success
-
Fear of Failure
-
Fear of Change
-
Fear of Loss or
Death
|
-
Fear of
Self-Awareness or Introspection
-
Fear of Being
Judged or Embarrassment
-
Fear of the
Being Controlled / Out of Control
-
Fear of Trusting
Others or Commitment
|
Do any of those resonate
with you?
Many who meet
me can tell that I love people. I believe
in people. I know that people make mistakes and my motto
is "love them anyway." However, I've always had a fear of
meeting new people. Aren't we all taught not to talk to
strangers?
In many cases, we have feared
something for so long that we don't even recognize that
it is actually fear that is holding us back. Here
are a few symptoms that can be attributed to fear:
-
Procrastination,
Laziness
-
Absentmindedness
-
Anxiety, Stress
-
Social
Withdrawal, Distrust
|
-
Restlessness -
always busy, busy, busy
-
Overanalyzing or
Perfectionism
-
Inability to
stay in the "Now"
-
Frustration, Guilt,
Obligation
|
Do any of those resonate
with you?
If so, they may be born out
of your fears. |
|
|
Fearlessness
Fearlessness: quality of mind enabling one to
face danger or hardship resolutely; quality of mind
or spirit that faces or endures perils or
difficulties. It is characterized by firmness and
determination, as in temper, spirit, and actions in
order to achieve one's purpose.
To be
fearless is to face the reality of your situation
without underestimating yourself or deluding
yourself that you are more powerful than you really
are. And then, at the same time, deciding who you
want to be, so that you can stand firm for what you
believe in most deeply and so that you can accept
criticism (because it will come your way). Fearlessness is the ability to remain "true" to who
you really are despite circumstances.
Perhaps the most famous quote on
being fearless was made by Franklin D. Roosevelt in his
first Inaugural Address in 1933:
"The only
thing we have to fear is fear itself - nameless,
unreasoning, unjustified, terror which paralyzes needed
efforts to convert retreat into advance." |
|
Steps to Achieving your Fearlessness
What's interesting is that
most of our fears are simply thought habits that
we've obtained and retained over the years. Initially, these
habits protected us from something. But, even when
we no longer need the protection, we still have
the habit.
For example,
let's look at my fear of meeting new people (not talking to
strangers). I recognized when I was about 24 years old
working as an analytical chemist in a laboratory for a
pharmaceutical company that this fear was no longer supporting me.
(Although it probably did support me when I was a toddler.)
I'd love to tell
you that once I realized my fear, I just started meeting new
people, but that wouldn't be true. Instead, I told myself
that there isn't much opportunity to meet new people in my
laboratory because I already knew those 3 people, even
though there were 2,000 people that worked on my site. We
had a company cafeteria and I would always get my food "to
go" and eat it at my desk. Again, I told myself that
there isn't much opportunity to
meet people at my desk.
Ok, to me, that
logic seemed very 'reasonable'. You, however, may recognize it as a
cop-out or 'rationalization' so that I could avoid meeting
new people. Whatever! Seriously, I did realize my fear and
decided to take a new approach. I decided to talk to people
I didn't know at work! Innovative as that was, I also
added a twist. Since my office was on the 5th floor, I
decided that I was going to talk to people in elevators -
the one place where people usually don't talk to each other.
First of all, it increased the challenge. Secondly, if they
didn't respond back to me, I could tell myself that people
just don't talk to people in elevators. (Maybe there was
another fear in there somewhere?)
The result?
People weren't that scary any more. Most of the time they'd
even said 'Hi' back to me. As I continued to practice, I
continued to grow. This once sabotaging thought habit has
now been replaced with a new supporting thought habit. As,
Og Mandino says in Scroll 1 of The Greatest Salesman in
the World,
"I will form
good habits and become their slave. And how will I
accomplish this difficult feat? Through these scrolls, it
will be done, for each scroll contains a principle which
will drive a bad habit from my life and replace it with one
which will bring me closer to success. For it is another of
nature's laws that only a habit can subdue another habit."
Now, I meet new
people almost daily. I purposely attend networking events
and give speeches to organizations so that I can meet,
interact and build relationships with 'strangers'.
So, here are the steps you can take
TODAY to begin to develop YOUR FEARLESSNESS!
-
Recognize and Acknowledge your fears. This starts with
self-awareness. Now, many folks
are afraid of self-awareness. They are afraid to
see their own shortcomings. Somewhere they
developed the thought habit that they had to be
perfect. If you're one of these people, overcome
that fear today!
Take a complimentary assessment and discover
a bit more about your internal dialogue and your
fears. If you're not one of these folks, then
you'll love taking the assessment and learning
more about yourself. (If you've taken this assessment
in the past,
DO IT again!)
-
Decide to improve. Once you are conscious
and aware of your weaknesses, don't be afraid of
them. Commit to take the steps necessary to improve any areas
of weakness as well as strengthen your
strengths.
-
Plan to break free of the fears that hold
you back. Want help in this area? Give me a call
or email. You really can get to the root cause
of your procrastination, your need to be right or in
control, your frustration, guilt and stress. Usually
it lies within your own mind, your own thought
habits and internal dialogue.
-
Do it!! Begin a program that helps you
improve, that holds you accountable for your
thoughts and actions, that allows and encourages
you to stretch grow, to make mistakes and to become
the real, authentic, unique, irreplaceable YOU.
|
 |

helps
you understand and overcome your fears!
Get started
TODAY! |
 |
|
|
|
November,
2007
Vol. 2, Issue 3 |
|
|
Click here to view online.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Upcoming Speaking Engagements
|
|
|
January 24, 2008
PMI Clear Lake / Galveston
5:00 - 6:00 p.m.
Mario's Flying Pizza Restaurant
618 W. NASA Road 1 Webster, TX 77598 |
|
|
|
|
"The greatest barrier to success
is the fear of failure."
- Sven Goran
Eriksson
"Fearless minds climb soonest into crowns."
-William Shakespeare
"The key to change is... to let go of fear."
-Roseanne Cash
"Many of us crucify ourselves between two thieves - regret
for the past and fear of the future."
-Fulton Oursler
"I must not fear. Fear is the
mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total
obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over
me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the
inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be
nothing. Only I will remain."
- Frank Herbert
"Let us not pray to be sheltered from dangers but to be
fearless when facing them."
- Rabindranath
Tagore
"Fear leads to failure,
those who are fearless are patient and valiant."
- Rig Veda |
|
|
|
|
"Excellent information.
Traci was able to bring the subject from a pure science to
practicality. COME BACK AGAIN AND PRESENT!"
- M.C., Program Mgr,
Houston, TX
"Original material that I
had never seen before. Relevant and useful to my profession."
- R.R,, PMI
Houston Chapter
"Thanks for giving us new and
fresh information. It is a new way to analyze (and attempt
to understand) our thinking processes. Your presentation was
practical and I will be passing this information onto my
team and colleagues."
- G.N., Director
Houston, TX |
|
Want to understand your fears?
|
|
|
Use the button below to start
the process!

The 6 Advisors Assessment Report
goes below the surface of behavior and personality
and measures with great accuracy the thought
processes that are driving your decisions and actions.
Your FREE
Introductory Assessment Report will include the full
measurements plus written narrative and helpful audio for two (2) of your 6 Advisors. We have selected the
clearest and most balanced Advisor and your least clear
Advisor. |
|
|

|
|